If you were to scroll through your phone, how many wellness apps would be staring back at you? Two? Three? Five? No judgement: Self-improvement apps have proven themselves to be valuable tools for people looking to meditate and practice mindfulness, work out more efficiently, track food and water intake, cycle sync, match with the right therapist, become more calm, and pretty much anything else in the name of bettering our bodies and our minds. But with the launch of Thoughtful, a new type of wellness app, there’s now a tool to help us navigate what’s inarguably one of the most overlooked components of mental health: combatting loneliness and deepening our relationships with others to live more meaningful lives. And it couldn’t have come at a more optimal time.
Last May, the US Surgeon General issued an advisory about the public health crisis of loneliness and isolation, warning that a lack of connection can have profound effects on both our mental and physical health. (Heart disease, stroke, and dementia? All included as potential conditions of chronic isolation, in addition to more obvious ones like feeling adrift and depressed.)
Identifying and dealing with loneliness is crucial at any age, but interestingly, more than 70% of millennials—arguably the first generation to truly assimilate with and embrace the digital landscape—report feeling it, according to Thoughtful. The app also points out that young adults in general report being nearly twice as likely as those over age 65 to feel lonely or isolated.
In theory, we know the remedy—more meaningful and frequent connections—but it’s often difficult to put this into practice in a culture that’s largely incapable of putting our phones down, even briefly. The Thoughtful app is the first tool of its kind to actually help us do what the name implies: find ways to to be more thoughtful with our friends and family in real time and real life.
Cofounded by startup veteran Elizabeth Shaffer and Jet.com founder Marc Lore, and backed by VCP Ventures, which itself was cofounded by Alex Rodriguez, the team spent two years working with psychiatrists to create what the company calls the Connection Style test, a series of questions that determines your personality archetype, relationship values, and communication style. Your results then power a personalized experience in the app, and you receive daily guided prompts to practice reaching out, showing up, remembering dates that carry emotional significance, and better connecting with people you care about.
“Coming out of the pandemic, it was clear that so many people were suffering from a sense of disconnection, but I think the problem started before then,” says Shaffer. “We all know that our friends and family give us a sense of meaning and purpose, but with our busy lives, we struggle to make time for them. I wanted to create an app that made it easy to spend a few minutes every day being there for our people.”
You might not think you need an app to remind you to meet your sister for an uninterrupted catch-up or to call your dear friend to wish her a happy birthday, but think about how much we do in a day—between work, the loop of rote daily routines and obligations, stressing over the news, and yes, obsessively spending time on our phones, life does get in the way. The Thoughtful app is, thankfully, here to show us that it’s possible to change that.
“I have always been aware of the value of my friendships, but since working on Thoughtful, I have been mindful of them in a deeper way,” Shaffer says. “I’m much less likely to cancel a coffee date and much more likely to send an “I’m thinking of you” text. I see spending time with friends as not only a fun thing to do, but as an investment in our mutual mental health, and something necessary for living a meaningful life.”
The Thoughtful app is available to download today, October 18.
